Life journal 36 It has been awhile since I last turned on photoshop to edit pictures that I took by myself. Months have passed as I struggled with my own head, until I finally managed to recover, bit by bit. Today, I found myself looking at an old picture which I took quite long ago, … More REBOOT


Life journal 35 Around two weeks ago, at a dinner with my friends, one of them told me the idea of writing about mental illness, or more specifically, depression, as a topic for his essay. I was thrilled to hear that, but then he said “My teacher didn’t really approve it, saying that the topic … More STIGMA


Miscellaneous 14 From sea to sea, their names are known Their beauty, their grace, their charm and their traits Yet the sailors tell a different story Of their voices, their songs, their alluring hymns. . Live in the depth, roam with the waves Never be seen, never get caught Myth of the ocean, as the … More THE SIREN SONG


Just a little announcement Hi. Although I mainly use wordpress to share all of my mindless writings, I also want to share some more smaller things, like a picture, a song, a piece of artwork, or even just a few sentences of that exact moment, all the collected thoughts that sometimes cannot be put into … More MOVING ON


Life journal 34 In the end, the greatest battle one will have to face is with himself. It has been two months since that day when I thought that I should have just ended my life. It was a scary thought, thinking that everything was over and the only thing that I could do was … More STRIVING


Life journal 30 It has been a long while since I last had a decent dream about real life. Strangely enough, because it was not a bad dream, it even made me feel worse when I woke up. The thing with bad dream is, even though it’s not a nightmare, it’s already so bad that … More DREAMS


Disclaimer : I don’t own Vocaloid, but I do own this fanfiction. I wrote this a few years ago, but only now decided to post this. This fanfiction was inspired by a Vocaloid song named “Servant of Evil”. You can check the song here before reading. Please forgive any grammar mistake I might have made … More SERVANT OF EVIL


Miscellaneous 13 How many times can you lie until you break? Well, it would be a pretty big number I guess… Then how many times can you lie after you have shattered? Apparently, a lot, or maybe too many… Until I am not here anymore… Why would you do that… I don’t know… Maybe I … More LIES


Life journal 29 Sometimes, I find myself in a strangely selfish position… When you help someone, it is true that you probably don’t need anything in return. However, you still sometimes expect that they do, maybe just some small things which are nice just like what you have done for them. Ironically enough, that expectation … More DETACHED


Life journal 28 There is always this voice in my head, saying all the worst things even when the smallest misfortune happen… “Oh, because everyone will leave you again.” “You know that I am not wrong.” “You are both annoying and boring at the same time.” Although I don’t exactly suffer from the mental illness … More PARANOIA


Miscellaneous 12 For so long, you have been with me, Through tragedy, betrayal and pain. For too long, you have stayed with me, To cover, to protect and to lie. “It’s okay.” You say. “Just keep me alive.” “In return, you’ll be safe from harm.” Such luring words, how could I turn down… Letting it … More MASK


Life journal 27 Ahh… So I have left, the place I used to think that would be my very first stepping stone into my future… An admirable university that used to make my proud of myself. Which only kills me inside… Just when I thought that I had somewhat made at least one of my … More PATCHED WINGS


Life journal 26 “Why are you leaving your school?” “How come? You are studying in the university that so many people dream to be in.” “With this score and this school, why are you leaving? Maybe you should think about it again.” Few days ago, when I was eating my lunch, a university which I … More THE OTHER ROAD


Life journal 25 Just for one moment… When you were preoccupying yourself, When you just finished a book or a movie that motivated you to keep on going, When you were working, When you were not “thinking”, You thought you were fine. Telling yourself “you can beat your own monster” And your nightmare would be … More STOP


Life journal 24 Saying “I like my high school.” would be a lie, because I never actually like it. For so many times, I have said “I hate it.”, and I did mean it. Well, nobody really likes exams, deadlines and such, don’t they? However, without doubt, My three years in high school have been … More HIGH SCHOOL