NEVER-ENDING HOPE

Random 4

People say “When you wish upon a star”

“All your wishes will come true.”

Every day, she prays to the last star of the night

For just one hope that she could see the clear blue sky.

This whole time, it has been so grim…

Even the mighty sun could not crack the cloud.

She misses the light, the warmth and the breeze

Of the sun, the air and the wind.

But one day, they were all gone…

Left her alone in the dark, the cold and the dust.

Time flies, but her hope still lies

Flickering like a dimming candle light.

She afraids that it would die one day.

Or even worse, it would remain as “hope” forever…

Just like the star, fading day by day…

Then that night comes as she looks up on the sky

Her only star is gone, swallowed by the void.

Staring into nothingness, her mind becomes blank

And she falls, with her hope hanging down from life…

“Hello miss, who are you?”

“Where do you from, and why are you here?”

She looks up, only to see a little boy

Wearing white clothes, and a skeleton mask

“I don’t know.” She replied. “I think I fell down…”

“From my hope, and my dreadful sky.”

“Is that so?” The boy tilled his head.

“Is that why your balloon is hanging up side down?”

“My balloon?” She questioned. “But I don’t have any.”

“Yes you do.” Then he pointed behind her.

She turns around, only to see a red thread

Floating in the air, with its end ties up into a balloon shape itself.

“Oh no! It is broken.” The boy exclaimed.

She just sits there, letting the emptiness fill her soul.

“But it’s okay. I can give you mine.”

“So you could get back up to your sky again.”

The boy holds out a red balloon, then gives it to her

She mindlessly looks up, facing the little boy.

He is smilling at her, even through the skeleton mask

And his balloon is filled with warmth light as the sun.

“But don’t you need it?” She asked.

“I’ve already made it through.” He replied.

“I knew that I could, so I tried my best.”

“And now I am fine, healthy and all.”

“No longer need to stay in the place in white anymore.”

She stares at the boy, and then the balloon

Slowly, she extends her hand…

Taking the balloon, she holds it close to her heart…

_ _ _ _ _

Lift yourself up, or hang your hope down

Life is not fair, but give it a chance.

Even when it only offers the tiniest things

Treasure them, as if they are the very last…

Inspired by an artwork from Nano Mortis.

[ Cover imagine belongs to the rightful artist. ]

“MONSTER”

Random 3

Where am I…

My eyes blinked slowly as I tried to open them.

Above me, there was the sky. It was coated in melancholy gray. No cloud could be seen, not even the faintest sight.

So cold…

I realized that I was lying on the hard ground. I shifted my body, only to figure out that it was so weak, as if there was no energy left. I struggled to sit up, then scanned around the place.

Few meters in front of me was a big fountain. There were many trees around, and there was even a large iron gate just behind the fountain. However…

The fountain was partly broken. Water fell down beneath it.

All the trees had withered. Leaves had fallen down all over the place.

The gate was covered with wilted vines and green mosses.

It seemed to be nothing but an abandoned garden.

I startled.

How could I even get here in the first place?

I tried to stand up with all my might. My legs felt so feeble, as if I had been running for hours nonstop.

Using the tree behind me as a support, I finally managed to stand on my feet. It took a while before I could actually walk, and the very first thing I did was to check the gate. But no matter what I did, it still shut tight. I sighed helplessly and looked behind me. There was a path leading deep into the garden.

I suppose I have no other choice.

Reluctantly, I turned around and made my way through the bushes along the way. For each step I took, the sound of leaves getting trampled echoed steadily in the air. Other than that, there was not any other sound. This place resided completely in silence, eerie silence.

After walking for a while, I saw a small curtain made of vines. The moment I used my hand to sweep it aside, I gasped in surprise. It was as if I had entered a room in this dreadful garden, and this room had several glass pieces hanging around. Those glasses shone faintly, glimmering with waving light. It was hard to believe that there could be such things in such a place. I moved to have a closer look at them. If I looked carefully enough, I could see moving images within these seemingly transparent crystals.

But these images….

Weren’t these…

My memories?

But not just any kind of memories.

All these glasses contained my happiest memories.

Even the ones that I thought I had long forgotten.

Gazing at them, I started to think of all my good memories. Yet, before I even knew it, a tear had already left my eyes.

Why…

Aren’t I supposed to be delighted seeing all these…?

Then why… Why don’t I feel happy at all?

Why do I feel so…

Sad…?

Just then, a strong gust came from the direction of the vine curtain blew violently into the room, making almost all the glasses fall and shatter on the ground. As I watched in astonishment, I saw an enormous shadow creeping behind me. Slowly, I turned my head back, only to see a mash of think black matter, with vicious red eyes and baring sharp teeth. Instinctively, I took a step back. The “monster” in front of me inched forward, revealing its long honed claws. Fear rushed inside me, as I immediately turned around and ran toward the opened door behind the room. However, no matter how hard I tried, my legs were still too weak, and the creature was too fast. My breath became heavier and heavier, alarming me that my body couldn’t take it much longer. It was not long until I finally stumbled and fell. As I struggled to get up, the creature had overshadowed me. When I looked up, its claw had already raised in the air, attempting to strike down. I tried to crawled away, but it was no use. My body was paralyzed with exhaustion and terror. I closed my eyes, turning my head away, waiting for the worst to come.

5 seconds…

10 seconds…

15 seconds…

But I didn’t feel anything.

I peeked my eyes, and immediately jumped when realizing how close those claws were to me. However…

Something else was standing between me and them.

No, some one else.

“Calm down. Don’t overexert yourself.”

It’s a female voice, and it sounds so familiar…

She turned to look at me.

“You are thinking too much.”

I startled.

The creature gradually retreated its claws. That was when I noticed those claws had penetrated through this girl’s chest, leaving a deep wound behind. Blood dripping on the floor like a small stream, and this person standing in front of my eyes did not show a sign of pain at all.

“Are you alright? Why did you save me?”

I jolted up. She turned around to face me, but did not say a word. Her eyes were covered with bandages, as well as multiple places on her body. On her right ankle, there was even a long chain which I could not see its end. Even though I couldn’t see her eyes, I still felt that she was looking at me. The creature had disappeared without a trace.

“Why don’t you answer me?”

I asked again, but this time, she just walked toward me.

And then she passed right through me.

Did she just…

I turned around instantly just to see where she was heading to, but I could not see her at all.

It couldn’t be a ghost right… Or even worse, my imagination…

Right then, I noticed something was left on the ground. It was blood, and most likely her blood. I followed the trail without any hesitation. There was this unknown impulse inside me, that I had to find her. Maybe she knew where this was, and how to get out of here…

The blood trail stopped in front of an old mirror. As I walked closer, my reflection in it became clearer and clearer. Not until I was only a meter away that I finally realized, it wasn’t my reflection. It was that girl, and she was standing there, inside that mirror. What frightened me the most was, if I observed closely enough, she looked just like me. It was like seeing myself, wounded and in agony. I froze…

Taking a deep breath to gather some strength, I finally managed to speak.

“Who are you?”

The girl tilted her head.

“Who do you think I am? Who do I look like?” She said with a soft voice.

“B-But…” I stuttered. “You can’t be me…”

“How would you know?” She replied offhandedly.

“I am not covered in wounds!” I almost yelled at her. “And I’m not bleeding my heart out like you are right now!”

“Then, why are you crying?”

I was stunned when hearing that.

Instinctively, I moved my hand to my cheek. It was wet.

“Why do you cry?” She asked.

“I…”

Why do I cry? Why can’t stop crying…?

“It’s not the first time you just cry without knowing why, am I right?”

“…”

Why is it always me ?

Cursed with these blasted tears…

“Why did you save me?” I tried to wipe the tears in my eyes.

“I am you right? That thing hit me, so you were not saved.”

“Nonsense! I’m not hurt at all. I’m…” Feeling her eyes were gazing deeply at me, I found myself unable to finish the sentence. Even with all the bandages, she still possessed the look of someone who could see through people’s hearts.

“What is wrong with your eyes?” I asked heartlessly.

“They are in pain because they have seen too much, even things that weren’t meant to be seen…” She paused for few seconds, then finished her line. “So “I” decided to “cover” them.”

“You still can see things. I can feel it.” I retorted.

She sighed. “Occupational hazard of being observant, right?”

It was like an arrow pierced right through my heart.

“You are bleeding. Don’t you feel at least hurt?”

“If you’re used to it, I suppose you can’t really feel that much anymore sometimes, can you?”

Every single word she said feel like needle stabbing my soul. It pained me so much, but I could not shake it away…

“That-That monster…” My throat became hoarse. “W-What was it?”

“…You know what you really see as a “monster”, right?”

“…”

Battling a monster called “life”,

Not knowing if I could get by….

She silently watched me as I lowered my head, lost in thought.

“You should be going.” I heard she sighed. “I’m leaving.”

“Wait!” I shouted out when I saw her walking away, fading inside the mirror. “Where is this place? How do I even get out?”

She stopped for a moment, and turned her head to face me.

“It is the most truthful “you””. Then she disappeared.

“No! Wait! You haven’t told me how to get out! Please, come back!”

Please…

_ _ _ _ _

“Hah!”

I jolted up from my bed, breathing heavily. Sweat dropped down from my forehead as I wiped it away. Looking around, I saw my room, and I was sitting on my bed. The clock besides me ticking 5 am. It was almost morning.

I guessed that was just a bad dream…

Nevertheless, I should start preparing to go to school and repeat the whole boring meaningless routine again…

Sigh… I wish people weren’t so stereotype.

After making sure that everything I needed was in my bag, I took the comb and fix my hair again, then swung the bag over my shoulder, heading to the door.

Don’t throw “life” away.

I abruptly stopped walking. Turning my head to the left, I saw that “me” in the mirror. I jumped unconsciously and looked around, but saw no one inside my room. I looked back at the mirror again. This time, I only saw my reflection. I stared at my reflection for a moment, then slowly looked down, sighing heavily.

“Life” is also suffering too…

Clenching my fists, I stepped out of my bed room, waiting for life to take me away…

[ Cover image belongs to the rightful artist. ]

DISTRACTION

Random 2

Every morning, she wakes up at noon.

Turning on her laptop, putting on some music.

Then starts the daily routine of “distracting herself”

May that be spending hours playing game,

Practicing violin, writing stories,

Reading books or manga,

Watching movies and animes…

Anything that keeps her away from thinking.

From acknowledging the world around her.

It pains her, every time she’s aware of all those meaningless things that she’s doing…

For their purpose is just to keep her sane…

So that she can “live” on…

At least, until that cursed day comes…

[ Cover image belongs to the rightful artist. ]

 

 

AGONY

Untitled 3

There are so many feelings that I cannot describe.

Or even know why they are there.

Sometimes I mentally ask myself…

“For what reason did you cry?”

But I’m never sure why.

Either that there is none.

Because I feel empty inside.

Or there’re just too many.

When every broken piece of feelings gather around.

Slowly it becomes a loop which I want to escape.

To be free from this emotion roller-coaster.

But I never can…

[ Cover image belongs to the rightful artist. ]

BOTTLED

Untitled 2

I don’t know since when I have lost the ability to speak my heart.

Maybe it was because the unpleasant experience from long ago…

The time when I was still so naive to think that people would actually appreciate what I called “treasure”.

My mind has never been at ease.

Because my collection of thoughts keep adding up day by day.

So unstable, like the weather,

The melancholy kind of weather.

Until one small bottle reaches its limit…

Other ones might crack as well…

This feeling…

I just want to escape from it.

But I wonder though…

When was the last time I actually saw rainbow…?

[ Cover image belongs to the rightful artist. ]

HAIL

Miscellaneous 5

“It’s only a drop of water away till it break…”

_ _ _ _ _

It is so cold today.

The sky looks ominous.

Is it going to snow soon…?

Or… worse?

I hear a lot of noise from upstairs though…

She must be busy doing something…

But what…?

_ _ _ _ _

Oh…no…

Not…again…

_ _ _ _ _

*Crack*…

As I thought…

It is not snowing, but hailing…

*Crack*…

What is that cracking sound I keep hearing…?

Is something going to break…?

*Crack*

Why is the floor wet…?

Where is this water coming from?

Could it be…

Those bottles behind that door…?

And this mirror…

Why is it shaking…?

No… I am feeling sleepy again…

But I must tell her…

I must get to her place.

I must not fall asleep this time.

[ Cover image belongs to the rightful artist. ]

CELIA

Untitled 1

Hi.

My name is Celia, and I am a highly sensitive person.

But I don’t think anyone know that.

All because… I hide it too well.

_ _ _ _ _

People around me think that I am a cold-hearted person.

They never know how much is hidden inside.

But that is fine, because that is what I want.

Letting my mind tell me what to do.

That is why I always carry so many masks with me.

So I could be whoever it tells me to.

It’s a lot of work, to be honest, to keep this going…

To the point that it’s exhausting sometimes…

But even so…

I must still go on…

[ Cover image belongs to the artist. ]

 

 

 

MIRROR

Miscellaneous 4

“Everything has their own limitation…”

_ _ _ _ _

This mirror…

It’s the door to another world…

Or so she said…

It has been here for the longest time.

Each of us has one.

But mine is firmly sealed.

Since when…?

_ _ _ _ _

Every time I try to talk about the mirror…

She always shakes it off.

Her mirror is unsealed, that I know.

I wonder if she uses it often…

There is just one strange thing…

Why does her mirror have so many cracks…?

[ Cover image belongs to the artist. ]

CONFUSION

Miscellaneous 3

“It just keeps adding up, the pains, the feelings, the unspoken words…”

_ _ _ _ _

“Um…”

I wake up in the middle of the night.

Have I been sleeping since then… for this long…?

The light is still on.

“Huh… There is something in my eyes…”

“Why are my cheeks wet…?”

Did I cry…

Why did I cry…

_ _ _ _ _

On the shelf, a new bottle has appeared.

It is also filled with water too…

Now that I think about it…

It happens like this every time I wake up after passing out.

It’s so strange…

Should I tell her about this?

_ _ _ _ _

I hear a cracking sound…

But this time, not from those bottles.

It’s the mirror…

I think it’s breaking apart…

Please don’t…

Don’t break…

[ Cover image belongs to the rightful artist ]

SKY

Miscellaneous 2

“Those feelings, those thoughts, those which I can never talk about…”

_ _ _ _ _

I have never left our house…

But I always look up to the sky.

The sky… It’s always cloudy.

Sometimes it rains, sometimes it snows…

And sometimes, it hails…

But on very rare occasion, the sun would come out.

Though it never lasts for long…

I wonder if she noticed too…

_ _ _ _ _

“Oh!”_I gaze at the sky. “It rains again…”

It rains so much these days…

Why…is…that…

I feel sleepy again…

It’s so strange…

I always feel so every time it rains, snows and hails…

Maybe…I…should…

Sleep…

But I wonder…

Will I ever see something after the rain…

[ Cover image belongs to the rightful artist ]

VOICE

Miscellaneous 1

“I remember hearing echos deep within, every time…”

_ _ _ _ _

She lives on the upper level of the house.

I live down here, just a bit below.

We rarely talk, even if we do…

I always lose my voice.

_ _ _ _ _

In my place, there are hundreds of glass bottles, filled with water.

Sometimes, I hear cracking sound coming from those.

“It’s so weird.”_I think. “They look just fine a moment ago.”

So I cover the cracks with some tapes and glue, and let them be…

I wonder if she could hear it too…

She always working so hard, never stop thinking…

Doesn’t she ever feel…

Tired…?

[ Cover image belongs to the rightful owner. ]